Twilight AU where Bella is rightly Creeped the Fuck Out by Edward rather than intrigued by him and, hoping to defuse the situation before it becomes a Thing, decides to talk to his “sister” about his behavior
What Bella knows about the fallout: Rosalie is out of school for a couple of days, and upon returning gives Bella a thumbs up from across the lunch room but offers no further explanation. Edward is absent from school for a couple of weeks, even when the rest of the Cullens are all there, and then carefully gives her space from then on out.
What Bella does not know about the fallout: Rosalie “Rapist Eater” Hale tore her surrogate brother’s arm off at the shoulder and beat him around the head with it while yelling “Don’t Stalk Girls” until Emmet and Jasper pulled her off of him and made her give the arm back.
Ok but imagine someone finds out that some journalist for a gossip website is writing an article on Kara and the DEO tries but they can’t get access to it and they’re all freaking out thinking it’s a Supergirl reveal and the article comes out titled ‘Who the hell is Kara Danvers?’ And it’s got a series of photos of her with Clark Kent and Lois Lane, her following after Cat Grant and interacting with Maxwell Lord. There are pictures from her college internship working at Wayne Enterprises – including candids of her eating lunch with the elusive Bruce Wayne himself. There’s a photo from years ago when she met Diana Prince while visiting Clark. A picture of her and Lena Luthor sitting close, leaning in to each other and whispering. There are excerpts of her quotes from supergirl, someone she seems to know personally.
At no point does the article mention her possibly being supergirl. It only talks about how this seemingly plain, average 20-something from a coastal small town is somehow connected to many of the most powerful and influential people from coast to coast. And thanks to the DEOs attempts to get the article before it’s published, there’s an editorial addition at the end that says after announcing plans to write on the reporter, their servers were attacked and nearly hacked in to in an attempt to stop its publication.
“So I ask you,” the article ends, “who exactly is this Kara Danvers?”
i love this and i want More
Someone fic this please.
Who the Hell is Kara Danvers?
If you visit Kara Danvers’ personal social media profiles, you’ll mostly find cat videos, pictures of lovingly crafted lattes from Noonan’s cafe, and selfies with her sister, Alex, captioned with a hashtag of whatever show they were binging when they took it. You’ll learn she’s a native of Midtown, and an alumnus of National City University, with a degree in business management. You’ll learn she’s a twenty-six year old staff writer for Catco Magazine.
On her professional accounts, you’ll find links to all her writing – a small but growing body of work mainly concerned with alien rights advocacy and L Corp’s rebranding in National City and generosity – and opinionated statements on human rights. You’ll find fond comments from James Olsen, Pulitzer winning photojournalist and head of Catco Worldwide Media, Catco staff photos featuring rare smiles from editor Snapper Carr, and a selfie with the Queen of All Media herself on Cat Grant’s last day at the Catco offices. Given Kara Danvers has been a Catco employee for four years, this might be expected.
If you visit Kara Danvers’ tagged photos, you’ll find selfies and candids with world renowned journalists Lois Lane and Clark Kent. Not pictures from an official visit to a rival news outlet across the country. Personal, affectionate photos of the Kent-Lanes in their home. With Kara Danvers. You’ll find a picture, taken by Clark Kent, of United Nations ambassador Diana Prince, a long time friend of the Kent-Lanes, with an -at the time – college aged Kara Danvers, Prince giving her a friendly kiss on the cheek.
If you go deeper down this rabbit hole, into paparazzi photos, you’ll find close to a hundred unique shots of Kara Danvers with the otherwise extremely private Lena Luthor. You’ll find them in public cafes, outside theatres, and walking out of bars. Close enough to reach out and touch, frequently laughing and beaming at one another. You’ll find shots of her outside Wayne Enterprises in Gotham with enigmatic billionaire Bruce Wayne, his arm around her shoulders as they duck into a BMW with tinted windows. Shots of her at public events tailing Cat Grant, chatting casually with Maxwell Lord.
And if you read Kara Danvers’ writing, you’ll find dozens of quotes from National City’s hero, Supergirl. These quotes seem off the cuff, casual in a way no other journalist has been able to coax out of the blonde Kryptonian, who has been noted in interviews with Cat Grant, Snapper Carr, and other acclaimed journalists to be somewhat tight lipped and cautious with the press. Supergirl currently has no known contact methods for the general public, but after every crisis, she is ready with an opinion and an encouraging statement… As long as it’s Kara Danvers’ name on the byline.
And finally, when this article was announced – privately, amongst our sites editors and writers – my editors and I began to receive cryptic threats from an untraceable source. They persisted for this piece’s entire development cycle, culminating on an attack on our servers that still has our site reeling. The only reason this article survives was that, by chance, I had made a hard copy for editing the night before.
I feel like I should elaborate that the prompt I sent would be
best with some Maggie thrown in the mix for maximum teasing
“Danvers?” Lucy asked, looking up from her never ending pile of paperwork.
“Lane.”
“Can I help you?” Concern drifted into her tone. Alex’s shoulders drooped, her crossed arms missing their usual intimidation. She looked completely worn out.
It was Tuesday. Lucy almost forgot that Tuesday was Alex’s mandated therapy day.
“Shrink gave me homework.”
“Oh… kay?”
Alex sighed and rolled her eyes. “What’s the field policy for agents with service dogs?”
“Depends on the dog’s training and the agent’s role, Danvers.” Lucy put her pen down and sat back in her chair. She motioned for her fidgety agent to sit. “We’re ADA compliant, of course. But there’s only so much we can do to promise the safety and security of agents and their dogs.”
Instead of sitting, Alex gripped at the back of the chair. Her fingers pressed so tightly they were turning white, and she wouldn’t meet Lucy’s eyes.
“Alex?”
“If the agent did what I do? Would- could- would I be able to go into the field?”
“Alex.” Lucy sighed. She dragged her hand across her face and rubbed at her eyes. “It depends on the diagnosis. And the dog.”
you hear a tapping at your window at night, you’re terrified but you go and look out. a feeling of relief washes over you as you realize its just your local cryptid asking for your wifi password, they want to message their friend, but most cell companies don’t sell data plans to nonhuman beings, so they just wanna use ur wifi for a sec
After about the 10th cryptid asks, you decide to put that spare room to use. You open up an internet cafe for cryptids only. As thanks, you are protected from abductions, sacrifices, and animal mutilations. Word gets around to their friends, and now legends from all over the state are coming just to seek asylum and relax for a bit from being hunted. Because your Cryptid Cafe is on your own property, any hunters can be charged for trespassing. More and more show up, and are now taking up the house. They’re nice and respectful to you, so you’re okay with this.
When witch!Lucy has her own place, this is what happens. Then her girlfriends want to get a place together. Lucy can’t just abandon the cryptids, but they can’t follow her either. She decided to suck it up and continue to pay rent on the place because one day, she’s gonna need their help with trouble magnets like—-
Oh. Ooohhh.
2×19. Before the trio are a strong trio. Before there’s talk about living in the same space. Alex goes missing. Alex can’t be found. Alex may just lose her life this time.
Lucy calls her house. She asks if any of the cryptids are willing to do her this favor. She will give them her soul in exchange if that’s what it takes. They say they’ll help her. And they do.
Alex is too busy trying to stay afloat. She too busy trying to keep the panic down. She too busy ignoring the cold seeping into her limbs. She doesn’t see the shadows move, there are no lights beyond her tank. She doesn’t see the claws and paws and too many fingered hands pressing against the walls.
The glass shatters. The water rushes out. Something foul fills her nose and she can’t handle the stench of rotting corpse on top of everything else.
Supergirl, doing another flight around the city, hears something call her name. It sends a shiver down her spine, the way it echoes in her ears, between buildings, and settles low in her heart. She follows the haunted call after checking in with the DEO.
Alex wakes up in the medbay of the DEO.
Lucy upgrades her internet to the best National City has to offer. She also does her best to keep every flavor of Mountain Dew, Oreo, and Kit Kat available. Kara doesn’t mind the trips to Japan, but she’s learned Lucy will never tell her where all those Kit Kats go.
I want to see a fanfic where Harry hatches a basilisk.
I want to see a fanfic where he looks up “magical snakes” as soon as he gets to Hogwarts because that thing at the zoo always bugged him, and so the Trio works out that it’s a basilisk immediately after the first petrification in Second Year. But they don’t know how it’s getting around or where it is or anything, so Harry is just like WELP SET A BASILISK TO FIND A BASILISK while Hermione and Ron are like HARRY NO.
I want to see a fanfic where Harry sticks a chicken egg under a toad and makes all these plans about how he’ll talk to his huge deadly snake and get it eye-blinkers and shit so it doesn’t kill people and make sure it’s not too aggressive, and somehow it never occurs to his twelve-year old brain that the chicken egg has a total volume of about four tablespoons and he is not going to get the giant King of Serpents he is expecting.
I want to see a fanfic where it finally breaks out of the shell and Harry finds himself with a bb!basilisk too smol to even have the murder-eyes yet, who can only petrify someone for about half an hour before the effect wears off. She eats spiders and gets tired very easily and demands that he wear a hood she can curl up in and sleep.
(She is also the same vivid green as his eyes and already hideously venomous, but doesn’t like using her fangs because she says they get cold and give her brain freeze when she unsheathes them.)
I just… I really want Harry with a haughty, demanding, arrogant danger noodle who has an overinflated sense of her own importance, views Hedwig as a TERRIFYING MENACE because she isn’t big enough to eat owls yet and keeps up a steady stream of insults hissed in Harry’s ear whenever she’s near someone who has a Dark Mark (which she can sense at close range). And who is basically useless as a familiar because she refuses to slither across anything other than sun-warmed stones or Harry, hasn’t got a very powerful gaze yet and doesn’t like biting people.
(Except snake-arm-people. She finds snake-arm-people confusing and annoying, and would probably make an exception on the no-biting thing where they’re concerned.)
I mean there are obviously a lot of factors influencing snake growth rate but if we assume basilisks just get stupidhuge because they grow their whole lives and are immortal, this snake is probably going to be at least 8 feet long by Deathly Hallows, which is a significant and intimidating chunk of scaly muscle that is intelligent enough to do what it is told. Like, you know, hey, bite this necklace.
So I mean by like his fourth year it’s going to be pretty hard to hide this snake that is nearly as long as he is tall and it’s not going to do much for his reputation that the Boy Who Lived has a pet fucking basilisk but holy damn does it make book seven a whole hell of a lot shorter.
I feel like I should write this
can you just imagine him ron and hermione coming up with increasingly ridiculous excuses trying to hide their pet baby basilisk in the dorms (hagrid would be so proud). how long do you think it’d take before harry’s pet basilisk is just a really badly hidden secret between all of gryffindor? and the ensuring antics of the entire house as they try to keep mcgonagall from finding out? (she knows something is up, but even just thinking of what could be big enough the entire house is trying to keep it from her makes her want to break out the firewhiskey)
ron gets the idea to try and practices parseltongue with baby basilisk since he hears harry talking in his sleep with it all the time anyway (and ngl, baby basilisk is kind of adorable and eats all the spiders in the dorm so he doesn’t have to deal with them, he’s pretty smitten once she hatches), and as soon as hermione overhears him trying it, she’s dragging him and harry to the library because, well, parseltongue is a language, why can’t they learn it? so it’s the two of them alternating between hissing at harry and hissing at the basilisk and harry is trying so hard not to laugh because 90% of what they’re saying is utter nonsense and the basilisk doesn’t even bother, because she likes these two humans but wow are they dumb, that’s not how words work.
Before Kara came, he took her for flights over the ocean and above the mountains, and her parents allowed it because he was like family and he was dependable and would never drop her or bring her to any danger.
He was in control of his powers, so they were never something Alex feared.
Only something that made her giggle (when he jump-started their old oven with his eyes) or shriek with excitement (when he took her flying above the ocean and let her toes skim the surf) or giddy with pre-teen mischief (that one time he bench pressed Eliza’s car single-handedly, just to entertain her).
“Clark, put it down!” Eliza had hollered out the kitchen window, but there was absolutely no concern or conviction behind it: just barely-concealed joy, that her daughter was laughing that hard, that earnestly.
As Alex got older – “an official teenager,” she’d called it, alternately grim and proud about it – her time with Clark became, of her own choosing, more serious.
“Do you miss it? Your planet?” she’d ask, because even though she’d asked as a child, Eliza and Jeremiah had shushed her with warning looks and cookies; but now, sitting in the back of Clark’s pickup truck, looking up at the stars with her cousin-alien-superhero-friend-brother, she was old enough to hear the honesty behind the way he sighed.
“I don’t remember it, Al,” he’d told her honestly, and even though her heart ached for him, she got that old familiar thrill in her chest that rose up every time he called her that nickname that nobody else did.
He’d taken off his glasses and rubbed at his eyes, and she wondered how anyone was stupid enough to not get that those were the same eyes, in stiff collared shirts or in a silly red cape.
“I was thinking, though. For your birthday, I could take you to the Fortress of Solitude. You’ll be an official teenager,” he’d smiled down at her, without the condescension of most adults she knew. “I don’t think your parents can make the ‘you’re too young’ argument anymore.”
“Well, yeah, plus I’ll be with Superman, so like,” she shrugged, barely suppressing a giggle-guffaw that made had them both laugh helplessly.
It was nights like that, that Alex missed most – aside from her nights with her parents, of course, because those were all torn asunder – when Kara arrived.
Because when Kara arrived, Alex suddenly wasn’t closer to being a grownup by choice, because she was proud of her thirteenth birthday, or of finally being a high schooler, of not being a freshman anymore.
No.
When Kara arrived, she was closer to being a grownup because suddenly, caring for a younger child who had lost everything while Alex had everything, was her new responsibility.
So when Clark started treating her more like a grownup, after Kara arrived, she wasn’t proud like she used to be.
She was bitter.
Bitter, because it was only in contrast to Kara.
The younger one, the needier one. Well, needier, and simultaneously needing nothing, because this Earth, really, was (literally) beneath her.
Just like it was beneath Clark.
Alex had never felt that way, though – beneath him – until Kara arrived.
They never talked about it – how close they’d been before Kara got to Earth.
How when he’d come to visit Eliza and Jeremiah, he’d always make sure to bring a new college sweatshirt for Alex – her collection was more than a little extensive – and souvenirs from all across the globe.
How he used to let her call him, even when it was way past her bedtime, so they could talk about middle school drama and her latest science fair project breakthrough.
How she was the first one he told when he got that promoted at that job at that weirdly named newspaper that he loved so much, because she was family, and family should always find out first.
They never talked about it, until Kara saw that look in Alex’s eyes when Kara had considered, even briefly, moving away from National City to be with him.
The coldness in Alex’s voice when she talked about Clark abandoning her.
Because yes, he had abandoned Kara with Eliza and Jeremiah, if one wanted to look at it that way. He had.
But he’d also abandoned Alex.
“You have to call him,” Kara told her sister, later that week, snuggled into each other, mid-spoon deep into their ice cream pints on Sisters’ Night.
And though they hadn’t mentioned Clark since they’d had it out and made it up, Alex knew who her sister was talking about immediately.
“Why?”
Kara took a massive spoonful of ice cream into her mouth and chewed thoughtfully. Alex rolled her eyes deliberately at the way Kryptonians never got brain freeze.
Another joke she’d used to have with Clark, during their ice cream eating contests. Her stomach churned.
“Because you weren’t just angry at me. You were angry at him, too. For swooping in here and leaving again. Like he left me with Eliza and Jeremiah and you. And, like he left you.”
Alex stiffened at that, but Kara stood her ground, even seated and tucked into her sister’s side.
“I know you two used to be closer. Before I came. And I don’t know. I think it would be nice. Healing, maybe. For you to talk to him.”
Alex tried to shrug it off. “I just saw him. Sometimes we go half a year without talking.”
“Exactly the problem,” her sister had booped her nose, and the shrieking and tickle fighting that ensued couldn’t wipe the thought from Alex’s mind.
She called her cousin the next day.
“Alex, hey. Is everything okay?”
She recognized his tone immediately: his I’m-Clark-Kent-Of-Course-I’m-Not-Superman-I’m-Just-Answering-A-Regular-Phone-Call-From-A-Regular-Person-Who-Most-Certainly-Doesn’t-Work-For-A-Clandestine-Alien-Fighting-Organization-That-I’ve-Spent-Years-Hating-And-Have-I-Mentioned-That-I’m-A-Clumsy-Nerd-And-Most-Definitely-Not-Superman?
She couldn’t help but smirk. Kara had the same type of voice when she was at CatCo.
“Yeah, no, everything’s great. You have a minute?”
She wasn’t the one with superhearing, but she imagined she could hear him shifting away from his desk; ever the polite farm boy, the family man with no family.
Except James and Lois.
Except, sometimes, Kara; and except, sometimes, her.
“Yeah, of course. What’s up? Kara okay?”
“Yeah, we’re all fine, I just… do you remember when I was a kid? And you’d take me out flying? Or bring me food from different cities, different countries? Kara does it, now, but you… you stopped. You ran away, really, when Kara came to Earth. From her, but also from me. I know it was painful, and it wasn’t something you expected or maybe even wanted. And I know how much you love her, now. I just… sometimes I remember when we used to have adventures together. Alex Danvers and Clark Kent, super secret investigators, remember? I was science and you were journalism. And I don’t know, you were just here, but it was like you weren’t really… here… and… sometimes I miss my cousin, Clark. And it… oh, whatever, I’m rambling. This is stupid, I’m sorry. Kara told me to call you, but I’m… I’m sorry, you’re busy, you have better things to – “
“Alex.”
“No, really, it’s – “
“Alex.”
“Clark – “
“Alex! Look out your window.”
She turned with a furrowed brow, and it only took a moment for a broad smile to take over her face.
Clark Kent was hovering outside her apartment.
Phone in hand.
Grinning.
Waiting.
“Wanna go for a flyby over the ocean?” he asked into the phone, and she saw his lips move very slightly out of sync with hearing it relayed through her phone.
She rolled her eyes – being a nerd must be genetic – and laughed as she hung up on him (he looked offended, which only made her laugh harder) and tossed open her window.
“If you drop me, I’ll kill you.”
“If I drop you, your sister will kill me first. After rescuing you.”
Alex considered this, nodded, and grinned. “Too true.”
“But Alex: I won’t drop you. Not again. Okay?”
She felt the rush in her blood that she always felt when she was about to step off the edge of solidity and let gravity take her into her sister’s arms, her cousin’s.
She hadn’t felt it with Clark in proximity in years.
Wind tossed her hair around as she nodded and stepped out her window into the safety of her cousin’s arms.
ME, A NORMAL CONTRIBUTOR TO FANDOM: So let’s talk about the pedagogical implications Thanos’s snap would have on the Sesame Street curriculum within the greater MCU.
I don’t know how pedagogical it is, but I guess now I’m thinking about Bert sitting alone in a room, missing Ernie.
That is absolutely the emotional core of what a post-Snap episode of Sesame Street would be about (I feel like Bernice would be missing too, and Bert would try to play chess with Rubber Duckie?), but for the episode to function there needs to be something they’re teaching the audience besides ennui, and that is where I’m really stuck.
Because the emotional core wouldn’t stick if it’s not supported by the structure of the show! But it seems like the Snap destroys basically all structures in place. But that makes the structure of Sesame Street that much more necessary. And then I spiral like this for a while.
Disclaimer: I have not watched a full episode of Sesame Street in a long time
Big Bird has been waiting for the store to open for a very long time now. He’s a patient bird, and he knows about waiting his turn, but his watch has the big hand on the three and the little hand on the nine and he’s pretty sure that Alan usually open the store when the little hand is on the seven.
Finally, when the little hand goes all the way to the four, the door opens.
“Hi, Big Bird,” Chris says, his eyes red and puffy. “We aren’t going to open the store today.”
Big Bird doesn’t understand; Hooper’s store opens every day. “Why aren’t you opening the store, Chris?” Big Bird asks. “I need beakpaste, I’m all out.”
Chris just looks sad. “Big Bird, did you hear about The Snap?”
“No,” Big Bird says, and the way Chris is talking is very scary. He feels like he might need to sit down. “I don’t even know how to snap!”
Chris steps out form behind the door and gestures for them to sit on the stoop. When they’re settled, Chris takes a deep breath before he speaks. “Well, a bad man named Thanos came to Earth. Do you know about Thanos?”
“Yes,” Big Bird nods He heard some of the grownups saying that name. “He fought with the Avengers.”
“That’s right,” Chris says. “And the Avengers lost their fight. Sometimes, even when grownups try really hard, they can’t do all the things they want to do, and sometimes that means that bad things happen.”
“Did a bad thing happen?”
“Yes,” Chris says, taking Big Bird’s wing in his hand. “Because of Thanos, a lot of people are missing. And Alan is one of them.”
Big Bird has to think about that for a moment. He went missing one time, when he was a blue bird in a circus, but his friends found him and brought him home. But something about Alan’s face tells Big Bird that this isn’t the kind of missing where your friends can find you.
“Is Alan dead, Chris?” Big Bird asks. “I remember when Mr. Hooper died.”
“The honest answer is that we don’t know. He might be. Or he might just be missing.”
Big Bird tries to understand that. “Missing?”
“Yeah,” Chris says. “He might come back some day, and he might not. We just don’t know.”
Big Bird wants to cry. He loves Alan, and he doesn’t want any of his friends to be missing. “Is anyone else missing?”
“Yes,” Chris says. “Some of your friends may be, or their parents, or yours cousins and uncles and aunts. A lot of people are. And it’s very scary.”
“What can we do?”
Chris is crying a little, a few small tears pooling at the side of his eyes, and Big Bird wants to do something, wants to say something, but he kinda feels like crying too, and doesn’t know what will help. “I don’t know,” Chris says. “I think the only thing we can do is be here for each other, and love each other, and take care of each other. When things are scary, and when bad things happen, the most important thing to do is look around at the people who are still here, and try to do your best for them.”
Big Bird nods. “Hey Chris?”
“Yeah, Big Bird?”
“Do you want a hug?”
Chris nods. “I would very much like a hug, thank you.”
Big Bird does the only thing he knows how to do; he opens his wings and wraps them around Chris, doing his best to be there for the people who are still with him.
So APPARENTLY, it’s very easy for Kryptonians to mix up us
humans. No, no really! I had to go on a business trip to National City last
year- and, I know what you’re thinking. ‘John. You’re a COMEDIAN. What kind of
“”“business”“” trip could a comedian even
take????’
Well, I’ll tell you….I don’t know either. I don’t! My
lawyers just put some paper in front of me, ‘sign here, sign here, sign here,
okay, you’re legally allowed to be a comedian in National City now.’ Like
before, if I was funny in town- they’d call the comedy police? I don’t know!
But, I’m there, in National City, already signed my comedy
license, exploring for a bit because, APPARENTLY, I might have a show there
later- and who should land in front of me, but Supergirl? That’s right. Supergirl.
Question of Smoke 