one of the ways i know this culture has a massive issue with consent
is the sheer amount of people I’ve known that just lie & tell people they’re deathly allergic to foods they dislike
because otherwise people will hound them, mock them, coax them, harass them, try to force them to eat it, or even trick them into eating it, and they will never hear the end of it
your coworkers will bake it into a fucking pie, call it something else, and wait til your birthday, gather everyone and their first cousins to sit around in a circle waiting for you to put a forkful into your mouth and then point rhythmically at you in a chanting, glaring, sweating, unholy circle like SWISS CHARD SWISS CHARD YOU JUST ATE SWISS CHARD HA HA HA SWISS CHARD NOW YOU LIKE SWISS CHARD
Because forcing someone into a situation where they don’t feel safe declining putting something into their body they’d rather not be there is totes 100% wholesome American fun
And this is something so known that it’s infinitely easier to just lie and tell people that you’ll die if you eat that food…which actually doesn’t always stop it from happening
Tag: consent
Here’s to the people who…
… Ask “can I kiss you?” or lean in halfway and then wait for you to close the gap.
… Tap the item of clothing and check to see if you’re okay removing it.
… Respect your boundaries *without* pointing out how “nice” and “patient” they’re being and how very hard they’re struggling to be okay with it.
… Surprise you with kisses *only after* you’ve told them how much you enjoy getting surprise kisses from them.
… Remember where you don’t like to be touched.
… Appreciate your body as it is and when it changes.
… Communicate before, during, and after intimacy.
Here’s to the people who make consent a natural part of relationships, as it should be.
Sex While Asexual: What’s Going On?
Disclaimer; I debated heavily on whether I should even write this. But with all my talk about how little sex education exists for asexual people, I’ve never taken a huge step towards explicitly describing the process of sex while ace from my own experience. It’s something that should be done, because very little of it exists.
This is a voice that needs to be heard for the asexual community as a whole. Also, there’s tons of non-ace allosexual people who have no clear comprehension of what goes on in the minds of aces under sexual duress. And more specifically, they don’t know what happens when you get a sex-repulsed asexual in a sexual situation. One that they willingly enter. Repeatedly.
Why is this information important? Because, chances are, this will be the first time you read a perspective like this. No one has ever given me answers about my aceness when it comes to sex. No one has ever taught my anything about sex education in the asexual experience. This is for all the aces out there. This is for all those people who have aces in their lives, and want to understand them.
Question of Smoke 