Serial tweetstory: A tenth life

microsff:

The ninth time she died, she found no path back; nothing to climb, no crevice to sneak through.
“Come,” Death said.
“Shan’t,” she said.

Death shrugged his bony shoulders. Cats can not be argued with.
“Then I shall not see you again.”
“Your loss, I’m sure.” She washed her paw.

She was alone, on a featureless plain stretching from horizon to horizon under a starless sky.
She washed her other paw, then had a nap.

She picked a direction, then wandered, napped, and wandered some more until she got bored. The plain did not change, neither did the sky.

When she woke again, she noticed a faint smell of cheese. She stood up, stretched, sniffed the still air, and wandered towards the scent.

After a while, she found a boy in simple clothes.
“Hello,” he said, “can you show me the way home?”
“Did you not meet someone tall, skinny?”

“I’m not allowed to talk to or follow strange men,” the boy said earnestly.
She nodded. “Fair enough. Do you happen to have any cheese?”

The boy smiled. “I’m a cheesemaker’s apprentice.”
He looked around. “But… my basket is gone.”
She sighed. No cheese? Then what use was he?

“Stand up,” she said, “as tall and proud as you can.”
The boy obeyed, and she jumped up on his shoulder, and then to the top of his head.

She looked around. Far away, she could see a tall, dark figure, walking off with another person.
She jumped down.
“Follow me,” she said.

They hurried after Death and his companion, and eventually they reached a little farmstead.
There, Death abruptly changed direction.

“Sorry,” they heard Death say, “my mistake. It’s this way.”
Had he glanced to the side, he would have seen her and the boy, but he didn’t.

A woman came out of the farmhouse, and the boy stared at her.
“Grandma!” he shouted, “it’s me!”
He ran to her, and she opened her arms.

“I knew you were coming, dear,” she said, “but I feared you’d be lost.”
“I had a guide!”
He got out of her embrace.
“Do you have cheese?”

The boy’s grandmother laughed, and went inside. Soon after, she returned with a saucer with grated cheese and cream and chopped liver.

She thanked the boy’s grandmother, and she waited until they went inside before she began eating.
When she was done, she noticed a shadow.

Death stood next to her, looking out over the plain.
“Sometimes,” he said, as if talking to himself, “there are those who are lost.”

She looked up at him, but he did not look down.
“I can’t see a way to guide those who won’t follow,” he said.
“Subtle,” she said.
“I know.”


Told in a series of linked tweets, started with no idea where it was going.

imayjustbejamesmoriarty:

defilerwyrm:

theplushfrog:

commanderflowers:

kinkshamer69:

i wonder if my pets have like a proper language and when i try to speak back to them im just speaking jargon

like for example my cat always speaks to me when I come home and i meow back to her and she’ll meow again & even though i don’t think twice about it to her it’s probably a situation where it’s like

her, meowing: “im glad you’re home”

me, meowing back: “tax benefits”

her, meowing: “why do u always do this”

me

cats actually have a human-specific language. cats don’t often meow at each other and seem to use subvocal communications that humans can’t hear to chat cat-to-cat. however, cats seem to use what humans would call “shout-until-you’re-understood” to speak to humans. so basically, it’s more like:

“I’M GLAD YOU’RE HOME!”

“tax benefits”

“NO, I’M GLAD YOU ARE HOME

“waffle iron”

“IT’S OKAY. I LOVE YOU TOO, MY DUMB HUMAN”

The domestic house cat’s wild ancestors have a much harsher voice, too. The going theory is that early cats mimicked human infants which tripped humans’ nurturing instincts, and then selective breeding did the rest.

We make a big deal over how dogs have developed the ability to understand human expressions and tones (and let’s be fair, that is in fact awesome), but cats are possibly the only species that has changed their vocal language to try to communicate with us.

what I love about this post (apart from cats because cats are ADORABLE) is the assumption that cats have words for tax benefits. 

mallorierocks09:

benteja:

holmesandtheroman:

madlori:

tastefullyoffensive:

by Xergion

This is true! The zoo where I volunteer (the illustrious Columbus Zoo & Aquarium) was one of the pioneers of this program.

Our zoo is known for raising cheetah cubs. Cheetahs have a terrible infant mortality rate and cubs are often rejected, so we get a lot of cubs to raise from all over the country (other zoos and sanctuaries, mostly).

The cubs are placed with a puppy friend when they are wee and small, so they grow up together like littermates. They play together, wrestle, and the dogs (yellow Labs) are so calm, friendly and well-socialized that the cheetahs take behavioral cues from them. When they meet new people, or go into new situations (which they often do, as ambassador animals for cheetah conservation), they check out if their dog friend is feeling chill – which he is – and then they know it’s okay for them to be chill, too.

Basically the dog is a service animal for them.

The cats need their dog friends less and less as they get older and more comfortable, but they still often hang out as grownups.

Our zoo does cheetah runs, where the cheetahs get to chase a lure and show off their speed. Often they’ll have one of the cheetahs run (we have like twelve cheetah), and then they’ll have one of the dogs do the run to show how much faster the cats are. People get a kick out of that. The dogs…let’s just say they try their best.

DISNEY MOVIE ABOUT CHEETAH GOING ON A JOURNEY TO FIND HER SILLY DOGGO FRIEND

Disney Cheetah and Doggo? HAD TO SKETCH IT!

I can’t even breathe, ONE AWW AND BREATHLESS!

nightangel0402:

captainamerica-ontheenterprise:

only-in-movies:

the-thought-emporium-imperial:

fini-mun:

sirartwork:

reblog for noises

“I wonder how this baby sounds”

“Ah. Like a mix between an electronic device on the fritz and what I imagine a baby raptor sounds like. Got it!”

I see, so it speaks fluent power drill.

The alarm seems to be going on your small furry device.

even after reading the comments I was not prepared

That’s like a Pokémon sound right there.